Not just a formality


Whether you wrote your own vows, or read it from a certain ‘template’ given,

something life-changing when you speak it aloud to that special person you are marrying.

I first said mine last month at the altar, in a hall full of witnesses. And that seems to have changed my life.

My husband and I both decided to write our own vows because we thought it would mean more to us that way. Not that we departed from the essence of the traditional vows, we just said some things in our own words.

It was when I was memorizing and reciting the vows that it really dawned on me what I was next stepping into. The moment it was spoken aloud, I had become someone’s wife. That’s different than being a girlfriend who enjoys all the perks of being pursued, or even a fiancé who gets to choose the kind of lace to be sewn on the wedding gown. This time, I made a vow.

In the days after the wedding, when little idiosyncrasies were about to bother me, what I said came back to me again – to love you and honor you. When things didn’t go as planned, again I was reminded by my words – to be your strongest supporter.

I have to say that it hasn’t always come naturally, although I wish it does. In the midst of learning so much more about each other on this new journey called Marriage, I want to place little reminders to myself about what I have promised. Even if I haven’t been all that, I know I can try again, and that’s the beautiful thing about marriage – you have the rest of your lives to keep working that out. 

Whether you are going through a rough patch or floating on cloud nine, it won’t hurt to remember and revisit that moment when you decided to commit yourself to that special someone for the rest of your life.

 I, take you, to be my husband. From this moment on, I promise to love you and honor you with all that I am, to be the help that God has made me to be, to respect you and submit to you as the head of our family, to be your strongest supporter, to encourage you and comfort you, in the good times and bad times, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, forsaking all others, I will be faithful to you, until death do we part. This is my solemn vow.


2 thoughts on “Not just a formality

  1. JoyN

    It’s always heartwarming to revisit your vows and think about the day you made that promise for all it mattered including all the promises spoken to each other. It so happen that I was looking through a short clip of my wedding video with my husband, right before reading your entry; made me cherish the journey of being the very work in progress that we are knowing and appreciating that I have my greatest supporter right by my side. Always fan the flame you have for each other, lest it dims.


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