I’ve just gone through the past week celebrating the man of my household, on Father’s Day and his birthday. We often hear about the sacrifices a mom makes for the family but things have been very different in my household since a year ago.
This time last year, I was going through a slew of diagnostic tests that led to the biggest ‘nightmare’ of our lives – I was diagnosed with Stage IV Lung Cancer.
We’ve had to make some adjustments as a family and the load on the husband has multiplied overnight. I thank God for the financial provision (and the insurance that covered all my medical bills) that allows the husband to be a full-time husband, full-time father. Literally!
So beyond the battle of uncertainties and the onward (somewhat) steep slope of recovery, our little girl and I have been enjoying the blessing of having our “man” around. Appreciation to this “man” is often downplayed by the lists of “to do’s”, for example:
As a husband,
I go to him when I need a shoulder to cry on and a ear to listen to my ranting when “life gets tough”, or when I need a cup of freshly squeezed organic juice. I am blessed with the best of everything – I get to enjoy the mussels and prawns while he takes the rice and I get to eat steaming hot oats while he goes without breakfast because he is busy washing up the dishes.
He has also become a victim of my harsh words especially when I am in pain. He’s unafraid to speak words of truth when I am on a downward spiral and is generous to lavish love even if it means buying a random item that is completely unimportant but simply that it makes me happy.
As a father,
Our little girl goes to him when she wakes up, needs to go to the bathroom, wants to swim, play or dance, needs her breakfast, wants a cuddle, too tired to walk and wants to be carried, too tired to eat on her own and wants to be fed … the list goes on.
She is a daddy’s girl who is assured of her father’s unconditional love and hand of protection. He doesn’t hold back discipline when the need arises and seizes opportunities to teach values even though it’s “easier” to just let it go.
It is natural for a man to gain his satisfaction at the workplace through climbing the corporate ladder. The sense of achievement through providing financially and gaining a reputation out there. But my beloved husband has laid aside all these and chosen to be the “man” in this season for the family.
It takes courage and devotion, and he has done all that excellently. It is no easy task for him, I know. The path he treads can be lonely especially with the uncertainties that lie ahead. But his steadfastness in this journey is nothing short of amazing and it has been the stabilizing force for our family.
I used to think that financial well-being and concrete future plans are the keys of a stable family, but my husband has shown me otherwise.
So this season has given me an opportunity to give thanks – for the husband and father of this household who has been standing unwavering in his love and commitment to me and our little girl. And this week has given me every reason to affirm and recognize him as the Man of Courage and Honor in our family and because of that we are truly, truly blessed!
This week’s blog post is contributed by Chia Yen who worked at Focus on the Family Singapore until a few months ago