Loving Our Children: The importance of observation

Joanna Foo is a mom of two primary-school going boys aged 7 and 10. She agreed to share with us how being observant helped her to notice her sons’ needs, and how she communicates love to them.

Joanna Foo Family Pic

Joanna, thanks for agreeing to this! Could you introduce yourself and your family?

I’m a mum to 2 boys: Joshua, aged 7, and Josiah, aged 10. As for my husband, he’s a freelance sports coach.

Right now I’m working from home; we made the decision around Nov 2009 that I would work from home so as to be able to nurture our children on my own.

That sounds great! How has it been being around them at home?

It is a privilege to able to be around them though there are good and bad times. There are also times when I get bogged down with work; Josiah would ask questions like “Mum, when will you be free to play with us?”

I treat it as a “warning sign” for me to know that he needs my time…!

It’s nice that you take it positively!

I’m thankful that Josiah seeks to spend time with me even as he gets older.

I believe that as parents, it is important to be sensitive and open to pick up our children’s needs through their speech and actions, and to find ways to meet them.

So what do you do to try and meet their emotional needs?

Both Josiah and Joshua value the spoken word. When I cook meals, my boys tell me “Mmm… the food looks good, Mum!” Their verbal appreciation for what I’ve made, though simple (like steamed meat, sunny-side up egg, vegetable soup and rice) is an indication that they value words of affirmation.

I also realized that they like to hug both my husband and myself freely, so we also intentionally be affectionate with them.

It sounds like observing your children is a key way you tune in to your children’s needs. Do you have any tips and suggestions for other parents?

I believe that as parents, we need to evaluate whether we have given priority to investing time and effort in our families. If we view our families as being important to us, we will naturally think of ways to spend time and connect with them amidst our busy schedule.

When we spend time connecting with them, it will not be difficult to know them and their needs 🙂

How have you discovered your children’s needs? Share with us in the comments below!

This post is part of Loving our Children series that we’re running this October in conjunction with Children’s Day. Discover ways to effectively love your children on our website and download a free activity pack!

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