They say it takes a village.
I say it takes a super-granny. And my mum is the quintessential super-granny.
The kids love her to bits, and she loves them too. She can easily handle all three of them at home, and even when they’re running amok at the playground.
She is super calm and zen, and she hardly raises her voice at the kids.
She pampers them, as all grandparents do. (Within limits of course, as she also tries to follow my dietary preferences and regulations.)
The hubby and I recently made off to Phuket on our second honeymoon. It was four days of bliss and we were thankful for the time we had to reconnect with each other. Guess who took care of the kids – super-granny.
My mother has always been actively involved in my parenting journey. Apart from some breaks in between when she took time off to rest and recharge, she has been around, regularly helping out in our household, from the time my first child was born – 6 years ago.
She’s seen us grow from a young family of three, to four, to five.
She’s been a huge blessing to me and my family. She, together with my godmother. (Yes, the kids have two super-grannies.)
Life isn’t always perfect. As with all inter-generational relationships, conflicts abound. But I’ve chosen to err on the side of being grateful.
Because of their sacrifices for us, I’ve been able to enjoy peace of mind during those times I’ve had to leave home for meetings or just to indulge in some me-time.
Because of them, I think I’d be the first to jump in when some twenty years down the road, my children say they need help to care for their offspring.
Where some will see it as a chore, or as the end of freedom, I’ll choose to see it as a privilege. Because I know that’s how my own mum sees it.
A privilege to care for our future generation. A privilege to walk alongside my children in their own parenting ups and downs. A privilege to be able to pass down parenting wisdom that hopefully will stand the test of time.
Yes, I’m sure the inter-generational tensions will still be there. The parenting styles and methods will change with time, and I can already hear my kids complaining, “Mum, that’s so out-of-date! Nobody does that today…”
When that moment comes, I pray I won’t take offence for being made to feel like some antiquated being. I pray I’ll be able to take it in stride and listen more than try to squash my “wisdom” and “experience” down their throats. I pray that I’ll be able to see it as a partnership. As give-and-take.
For when I become a grandmother (oh, happy day!) I’ll be in a different position altogether. I won’t need to worry so much about discipline. I’ll leave that in the fine hands of my kids and their partners, where it belongs. I’ll only need to worry about how to lavishly love the children, and how to abundantly care for them.
Dear mum and godma, thank you for being the most awesome super-grannies the kids could ever have. Your love for the children inspires me… Because of what you have done for us, I can’t wait to be a super-granny too.
This guest post comes courtesy of June Yong, a stay-home mum of three and writer behind mamawearpapashirt.com. She shares grace-filled stories and lessons learnt from her own parenting journey, as well as ideas on how to live a simple and playful life with our children.